Walking By Faith...

There are times when God just does things, and I have no idea how it's going to work out.

Like right now.

God has spoken to us LOUD and CLEAR that He means to get us home ASAP. We don't know why, but we're going with it.

We need you to lift us up in prayer. Here is our intended schedule for the next three days (and also the reason why I most likely won't be blogging):

Thursday: Morning~go to orphanage, sign documents, close bank account, pick up Lily. Afternoon~Drive to Kyiv (typically takes four hours). We MUST make it to Kyiv by 4pm for our U.S. Embassy appointment!

Friday: Morning~Visa medical appointment. Afternoon~Pick up Visa

Saturday: Fly out of Kyiv at 6:45am! Please, PLEASE pray that we get bulkhead seating for the trans-atlantic flight. This is CRUCIAL!!! And with such late notice, maybe impossible.

Please pray for everything to go smoothly. Pray that Lily is a good traveler. Pray that we can figure out what she eats and get her to eat (all while traveling, of course). I am nervous, so nervous. I thought we would have about 5 days with her to figure her out before we had to travel so much. But God has a bigger plan, clearly! Never in my wildest dreams did I expect to be going home this fast.

I'll update as much as I can. Here we go!

Lily Anna StClair: An Orphan No More!

A story of redemption...

Lily Anna StClair

Born "Anna" on March 14, 2009 in Kirovohrad, Ukraine

Adopted on June 29, 2011

An Orphan No More!

Lily Anna has a family:

Tomorrow is "Gotcha Day"!

Ergo, Lily.

Today's visits were MUCH better! Lily was overall more calm and making fewer grunting noises. She also wasn't nearly so tired (though we did see a few yawns). Rob got more smiles out of her today and I even caught one on camera! No giggles, yet, but I'm sure they will come.

A smile!

We brought our smallest outfit to see if it would fit Lily, and it did! It's a 12 month by Carter. Isn't she cute in it??

Flexible girl :)

Monkey Butt!

The pacifiers we bought yesterday were a BIG hit. She had one in her mouth almost the entire time.

The best part of today was discovering how much she likes to be held in the Ergo carrier we brought. I was prepared to have to get her used to it, but we put her in it and she just calmed down. She loved it! That plus the pacifier brought lots of gazing into Mommy's eyes :)

We even got to walk around outside for 10 minutes!

Lovin' the Ergo

Tomorrow at 9am is the big day: Court!! We don't expect any problems but prayers are ALWAYS appreciated. Thanks for your encouraging comments here on the blog, and please keep them coming! They are like a breath of fresh air for me and I read them over and over :)

Our First "Real" Visit

I am going to be honest with you: today's visit was hard. When they brought Lily to us she needed a fresh diaper (which I neglected to bring), she was hungry and ready for a nap. So we made the best of a tough situation, but it was hard to know that we couldn't give her what she needed. Then we had two hours with her, trying to keep her happy.

The first 30 minutes were fine and that's when we took most of these pictures. By the end she was just done with us, lol. I mean, who can blame her? She's probably never been in that room before, with two strangers, being held and touched more than she's used to....I'd be overwhelmed, too.

Tomorrow we will get TWO visits with her for the first time: 9am-10am and then 1pm-3pm. Then Wednesday morning at 9am we will have court and she will be legally OURS!

I just had to try out this headband to go with her "Gotcha Day" outfit. She was not a fan, lol!

"Who's this?"

"It's Mama!"

"And not through the looking glass!"

"I like this toy but it doesn't have any food!"

The first of many yawns...

I love how Lily and Rob both have the same expression in this picture:

Rob did get a smile out of her today by tickling her.

"What's this? Daddy's face?"

"This is interesting..."

"I'm ready for my close-up!"

Doubts

I have vowed to always be real on this blog. Parenting isn't all sunshine and roses, and adoption isn't either. Anyone who tells you otherwise is lying. Period.

And if you're just here for the pictures, there are none today. We just can't get that many good pictures through the hospital glass. Most of the time the curtains are shut so it is dark, and Lily is in a crib that is not close to the window.

Today was (hopefully) our last visit at the hospital. Tomorrow Lily should be moved back to the orphanage. I'm glad it was our last visit there because that place is wearing on me. Today as we stared through the looking glass I just started to wonder if any of it matters. Does it matter to Lily that we come to see her every day for 20 minutes? All we can do is knock on the window. Sometimes that gets her attention but it doesn't keep it.

Do our visits matter to the other two children in the room with her that we've fallen in love with? What will happen to them? Will we ever see them again? I've taken so many pictures of them but I'm not going to post them on here. They are somebody's child and I will respect their privacy. Will they ever have a Mama or Papa?

And as I looked at Lily I felt doubts creeping in:

• Will she learn to smile and laugh?
• Will she learn to make eye contact for longer than a few seconds?
• When she is rocking herself, will I be able to comfort her?
• When she is lost in her own little world that has been her coping mechanism, will I be able to help her out?
• How long will the stimming last?
• When will she walk?
• When will she talk?
• Will she learn to sign?
• Does she have the slightest clue who we are?

I say all this now not because I expect answers to fall from the sky, but because I want to have a record of my thoughts. Months and years from now I want to look back on this list and be able to answer those questions. I want other adoptive parents who are thinking the same things to know they are not alone.

I am ok with not having answers right now. But it is still hard.

Friday's Visit Video

Moving On Up!

To the Penthouse Suite!! Seriously, that's what our new apartment feels like after the Japanese Room. We are downtown across the street from our lawyer's office and on the top floor, so the ceilings are really high. Ok, on to pictures:

Wow, a table with chairs! err...stools!

More of the living room:

A very nice couch:

And a REAL KITCHEN!

WITH A RANGE! (No oven, though)

A bathroom that can fit more than one person at a time:

And a WASHER! (Yes, I'm hugging it: no more washing clothes in the shower!)

Bedroom:

Wardrobe:

And the view:

The very first thing I did was a load of laundry. We even have a small enclosed balcony with a clothes hanger for drying! Ahh the luxuries...LOL! The Smith family (adopting Winston) arrived today and they are staying in....yup, you guessed it: the Japanese Room! There's no escaping it. However, with our fast court date we should be back to Capital City next weekend so they can move over here when we leave...it's like musical apartments! 

Coming soon: A video of Lily from today that I EDITED (this is my first experience with videos, period.) I am so proud. And she is so cute! Stay tuned :)

Today's Pictures

"Is that you, Daddy?"

"Why can't you pick me up?"

"A kiss through the glass just isn't the same."

"Hey everyone, thanks for praying for me!"

"I can even rock out."

"Ok, can we go home now?"

"I'm sick of this glass stuff."

"I'm pretty flexible, too."

Baby Tushie!!!!

"I like this rattle."

"Look at my long eyelashes!"

"And my belly button!"

"Ok, Paka (Bye)!"